Heartbeat from death (1)

So many couples have parted ways just because of reading through their spouses’ phones, which to me, I think is wrong.

If I may ask, is it proper to go through someone’s phone without the person’s permission?  I find it difficult to take someone’s call and I definitely don’t expect anyone to take mine.

Ego has been in a serious relationship for five years. Ego and her boo were so much in love.

Ego suddenly noticed that a particular phone number used to call her guy frequently. She confronted him; he told her that the caller was just a little girl, stressing that there was no way he could ever had anything to do with such a young girl.

Ego made it clear that she was uncomfortable with the girl’s persistent calls and her boo’s supposed closeness to her.

Later, she was going through his phone when she saw the girl’s chat with her boo. She confronted him again; this time, he didn’t try to feign ignorance or talk his way out of it.

He simply apologised. But she couldn’t get over it. She contacted the girl and warned her.

For reasons she couldn’t fathom, her relationship began to nosedived after that fateful call to the supposed, ‘little girl.’

Ego’s boo began to complain and nag at slightest mistakes. Worried, Ego ran to her friends, seeking advice. Today, that relationship is history.

Ego’s boo complained that she didn’t trust him. According to him, she went far with her trust issue when she called and warned the girl. He said the girl was just 18.

He said she was just the new intern they attended to his team, to train.  He told her they had come to the end of the road…the cross road. He walked away.

The story of another couple; the wife copied all the female contacts in the hubby’s phone. She called each and every one of them, warning them to leave her husband alone. She called them husband snatchers.

Abeg, how many women the guy wan ball?

She ended up calling a customs woman; unfortunately for her, the customs woman was the root of her husband’s wealth. The husband was into clearing and forwarding. The customs woman used to bring several businesses his way.

She copied her number and called, warning her to leave her husband alone.

The woman called the guy and told him never to bring his consignment or come to her for help anymore. Since, then things have not been easy for this guy.

Receiving your spouse’s calls, will only break your heart. Let his phones be; taking his calls cannot change his or her cheating habits. And when you try to confront him or her that makes him or her to be extra careful. He/she will just restrategise.

Comfort is course mate, who came to class seeking advice on how to handle a situation she invited on herself.

According to her, there was this particular phone number that used to call her husband every 11pm. She said that the conversation used to last for hours.

One fateful day, she copied and dialed the phone number. The number was saved with ‘Ayomide,’ but true caller presented ‘Bola.’

When she called, Bola picked, but Comfort didn’t respond. She said she called just to be sure if it was a female that was calling her husband at ungodly hours.

When she realized it was a woman, she changed towards her husband; she became cold.

Although she was seething, she wasn’t brave enough to confront her husband about Bola. Today, peace has disappeared from that marriage because of trust and midnight calls.

We have seen and heard cases where men beat up their wives because she dared to pick their calls or peep through their messages or WhatsApp.

Women have also been battered because they received calls from male friends, irrespective of the nature of the relationship.

The bully, jealous and complex suffering attitude is prevalent among men who marry ladies that are extremely too young.

Such men would question every call the wife receives and monitors her calls and chat like a hawk watching out for little chicks.

Bros, you go die for nothing! Check your BP abeg.

Another case study is Ronke. The hubby used to go through her phones SMS for no reason. He soon graduated to picking random number, saved under male names, to call.

He started suspecting his wife without a cause. Perhaps her only crime was being beautiful.

Ronke was a pretty lady and her hubby, quite older than her with about 16 years. He accused Ronke of sleeping with her boss in the office. The centre couldn’t hold anymore. Things fell apart in the home front.

I’m of the opinion that you should let your spouse’s phone be, because you’ll end up hurting yourself. When doubt sets into a relationship, trust buried dies and is buried.

Sometimes, it’s better to pretend that he or she remains the same person you married some years ago.

Contribution by Glory Francis (08038465069)

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